lucky

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my first preschool mother’s day art work… felt so glad to receive this as I picked up my girl from school… I even hugged her teacher!

I can’t tell you how lucky I feel to be a Mamma… before I had children I felt like what I had was enough… my things, my being, my happiness… but then the day came when we became 3 and my world became complete. Of course I felt complete before… loving myself is most important … then their is the love of my husband… my best friend… my soul mate… but then their was this love that was inside of my heart… ever since I was a little girl… I always have wanted to be a mother… and now I am of two little girls.

They both make my heart feel so heavy but so light… they love me no matter what, no matter when, no matter how… just pure little girl love. They hold my hand because it is there and it makes them feel safe. I cannot count how many kisses or how many I love yous but each day it feels like a million more… I don’t ever want this feeling to fade… and it won’t… I won’t let it… as a mamma your heart grows double for each child, I swear. I never knew this would happen 4 years ago when I had just a normal girl heart… but now I have a mamma heart and it’s a heart that cries over sweet sayings, a heart that aches when my girls are sad, a heart that loves my husband more as I see him in our girls… it’s a beautiful thing here.. this mamma job… and on Mother’s Day and always I feel so lucky. I thank them every night and tell them how happy they make me… Last night our oldest had a sad night …as our youngest wasn’t feeling well… so we were all camping out in every which one’s beds… I was exhausted and don’t even remember who’s bed I was in… but I remember putting my arm around my oldest girl’s belly and she woke so soft… and opened her eyes as I stared at them…. she shut them and and signed and them smiled… so safely… so happy. she feels so lucky to be my daughter… and that to me, is enough…

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we had some really ripe bananas this morning so we felt like staying in and being cozy… baking day!

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getting the pan set… love how our youngest just sits with anticipation… and has to wiggle her toes…

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chores… making her bed.. everyday… she’s great!

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painting some things for Uma, Farmor, and Mimi (my mom, Pappa’s mom, and my grandmother).. for mother’s day

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I love to let my girls paint all their hearts let them… no direction… no rules… just messy beautiful painting… and it usually turns out beautifully…

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I also feel so lucky that I have a job that lets me have my number one job of being a mamma/wife. Having our own business is a lot of work and the way we do it is fantastic… we alternate and work while the girls sleep, are at school, or are with the other one of us. It allows me to be off on Fridays and stay at home and make banana bread and paint… but then I love how good it feels to be working and being a part of our family business…. sometimes I work so hard at photography that I feel empty and drained but my girls fill me up with love just like taking a watering can and watering a flower… and I feel amazing